Well I cannot believe tomorrow is November! I’m already feeling that “end of year fatigue” that I think is quite common this time of year.
It’s been a stressful year for me. At the beginning of the year I was so amped because everything in my life seemed to be on track for a change! I had finalized my divorce after a very long and difficult 14 months of separation. I finally moved into a beautiful family HOUSE – not a flat, house – and 2012 was looking so good!
Then things started coming apart at the seams… work got very stressful, and I eventually got retrenched. That freaked me out more than I ever thought it would. So much so that even after being incredibly lucky and offered new employment within a month, I still somehow managed to get “diagnosed” with depression and prescribed anti-depressants and sleeping tablets… this really affected my waking hours (felt so spaced out) that the first 2 months of my new job are actually a major blur!! Whoa!!! How the hell did that happen?
It’s taken me pretty much up to now to start feeling some kind of positive about life again – and on some days I’m really excited about the potential I have with my job, but some days I think that I can’t do this. It’s frustrating because I still feel like I’m going up and down all the time and can’t seem to make up my mind whether I’m actually happy or not. I’m not taking the meds because I hate the way they make me feel. But maybe with the up and down I should chat about other options?
And now I’m tired and in the middle of trying to find a new home from 1 December. Looking for a suitable place is time consuming and exhausting. I found a gorgeous, huge house yesterday which I’ve applied for to share with my cousin, but we’re still a bit short on the required income so we may need a 3rd applicant on the lease. We’re chatting to my other cousin about it tonight but I think that we’ll probably lose out to someone else by tomorrow!
I have applied all over for places and waiting to hear back really freaks me out. I just want to find a place where I can feel comfortable and be happy – and preferably have all my animals with me! I think once this uncertainty of where I’ll be in 5 weeks time goes away I will feel like I can breathe again.
Honestly, 2012 can’t end soon enough for me. I want to go into 2013 with a clear mind, and a fresh new focus.
And I think 2013 will bring a new tattoo – I’m thinking of having the words “Gratitude & Patience” tattooed down my left side (under the arm, in line with my heart). Gratitude – to remind me to be thankful for all that I have, family, friends, love. Patience to remind myself that I have the strength to endure – to not worry about what I can’t control. Patience with myself and the ones I love most.
What a fun weekend! I really do feel so blessed to have so many amazing people in my life.
Friday evening was a quiet night in with wine, good food and great company (as always) 🙂
Saturday was tattoo day! I was so nervous and ready for a shot of tequila but my beautiful friend @cupcakemummy convinced me I didn’t need it, and it wouldn’t hurt. So with mega-butterflies in my tummy I went and got comfortable while Aidin from http://www.finelinestattoo.co.za prepped. Here are some pics of the process:
Aidin sticking the template on
Checking to see that it’s straight
Work in progress…
The final product… 🙂
I have to say it did not hurt at all, and I was actually thinking about and planning my next tattoo while we were still busy with this one!
The afternoon flowed quite nicely into an impromptu braai with some really awesome friends, cocktails, toddlers building forts with blankets and chairs, and very cheekily out-smarting adults with chilli and cinnamon challenges – coughing, spluttering, teary-eyed adults with kids (and other big kids) laughing hysterically at them made for a fun evening!
And while sitting huddled around the fire, talking about all sorts of kak I looked with a heart full of love at these people I call “friend” and I am truly forever grateful to have them in my life!
Cheers to amazing friends!
I am meeting with the tattoo artist tomorrow evening to go over some designs and decide on placement etc, and I’ve squeezed an appointment in at 13h30 on Saturday… so excited!!! 🙂
I told Aurora last night, while chatting about the temporary Tinkerbell tattoos she has, that I was going to get a real tattoo with her name on to show how much I love her. Her response was “I’m also going to get a real tattoo that says “Mommy” on!
Will post pics as it happens on Saturday!
I’ve been in contact with a tattoo artist (Aidin from Fine Lines Tattoo Studio in Blouberg) who is going to play around with some nice flowing fonts for me – the font I like
may be is too thick for what I want done.
He quoted between R650 and R750 – which sadly is way out of my budget… 😥 However, it being my birthday month I figured I’d ask friends and family interested in buying me anything for my birthday to rather contribute towards this… cheeky? Yes. But do I deserve it? HELL YES! 😀
And as always, my birth month is looking full of awesomeness already – new tattoo, weekend away (7th), birthday dinner with my gals at Beefcakes (18th), Heineken Symphonic Rocks (29th), Bilton Wines and ARO Dog Walk (30th), Rhino Run (my first trail run ever, 6km, on the 22nd)… Actual birthday on the 19th and work gives us half day so I’ll be taking advantage and head up Table Mountain for free with a bottle of bubbly to watch the glorious Cape Town sunset.
Oh yes! Roll on September – you and I shall have great fun together!